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Michael shares:

The population of people with HIV (PWH) is aging. In 2016, the CDC documented that nearly one half of people in the United States and dependent areas with diagnosed HIV were 50 years of age or older. As such, the frequency of aging-related conditions has increased during the last several years and will continue to increase dramatically in the next 10-15 years.Osteoporosis is a classic disease of aging; we know from multiple studies that the risk of osteopenia, osteoporosis, and fractures related to osteoporosis are all higher in PWH compared with HIV-seronegative people of the same age who share the same demographic factors.Causes of this increased risk for bone loss and resulting osteoporotic fracture are many. First, HIV-specific factors such as systemic inflammation may affect bone health. Second, PWH have many traditional osteoporosis risk factors. Third, certain ARV agents have been shown to be associated with decreased bone mineral density and fracture.

Finally, as stated earlier, the population is aging, so it is important to remain vigilant in trying to reduce fracture risk when possible.ART is one contributing factor to bone loss in PWH. Two of the main culprits among drugs used in the modern era are tenofovir disoproxil fumarate (TDF) and boosted PIs, both of which have been associated with decreased bone mineral density (BMD) compared with other drugs. However, the use of both TDF and the boosted PI class has decreased during the past 5 years. Although TDF is an excellent NRTI, negative effects on BMD have been observed, especially in people who already have compromised bone heath, and this may increase fracture risk. Fortunately, we know from switch studies in PWH and from assessing TDF as part of PrEP in persons without HIV that TDF cessation is associated with improvements in BMD. Similarly, although more controversial, boosted PI use has been independently associated with lower BMD and, in some studies, fracture. Some of this effect may be due to a combination of boosted PI and TDF, in which TDF levels are raised approximately 30%. Other studies suggest an effect of PIs independent of TDF use (eg, ACTG A5224s).

Nevertheless, switching from boosted PI–based therapy may improve bone health of PWH.Although the issue of ART and bone health has become less of a clinical problem with newer regimens, this does not mean that osteoporosis is not a critical issue in our aging PWH. Therefore, we must monitor our patients regularly to prevent fractures before they happen. Guidelines from the HIV Medicine Association of the Infectious Diseases Society of America recommend that the Fracture Risk Assessment Tool (FRAX) be used to assess risk of fragility fracture in men with HIV aged 40-49 years and women with HIV who are not yet menopausal but 40 years of age or older. Osteoporosis is a silent disease, and the simplest way to screen for it is by performing a dual energy X-ray absorptiometry (DXA) scan. A baseline DXA should be done in all postmenopausal women with HIV and men aged 50 years or older with HIV. The optimal interval between DXA or FRAX screening remains unknown, but a repeat DXA should be considered after 1-2 years for patients with baseline advanced osteopenia and after 5 years for mild to moderate osteopenia.

For patients with normal BMD upon baseline screening, data from the general population suggest an interval of up to 15 years between screenings. Unfortunately, DXA screening competes with other health screenings and is not done as widely as recommended. However, this method is inexpensive, noninvasive, and takes less than 30 minutes. Of importance, by identifying people who are at increased risk of fracture, we can intervene with bone-specific treatments—including lifestyle modifications as well as pharmacologic treatments—and reduce the risk of fracture by 40% to 50%. Preventing fractures is a critical goal of caring for aging PWH, and fortunately, with proper screening and management, we can achieve this goal.Join the Discussion

Do you routinely perform DXA screening on your PWH who fall into the age range for recommended screening? How often are you modifying ART in response to BMD loss in PWH? Please discuss your experiences in the comments section.HIV_Join_the_Conversation_button

 

    

Steve Stagon & John Ramos Invite You to 
Thursday Zoom Meeting  7 PM September 17, 2020

SEE LINK BELOW

SPECIAL GUEST PRESENTATION 

DR. CHRISTOPHER PAUL LACROSS, MD

TOPICS:

HIV & COVID-19

MEDICAL MARIJUANA 

MORE ABOUT DR. LACROSS

Dr. LaCross is with Midland Medical and accepting new patients, both for primary care, HIV management, transgender medicine, and medical marijuana certification.

Dr. Christopher LaCross grew up in rural New Hampshire, after which he attended Tufts undergrad as a Spanish major and then Tufts Medical School following a year off doing HIV research and working as an EMT. He completed his residency 4 years ago at Tulane in New Orleans and then moved to Fort Lauderdale to continue his work as an internist with special interest in LGBT healthcare and HIV. He has worked as a hospitalist locally and this past year transitioned to outpatient practice at Midland Medical Center to work in LGBT/HIV primary care at as well a medical marijuana provider.

.

Steven Stagon and John Ramos

Zoom meeting LINK:  

Topic: My Meeting Time: Sep 17, 2020 07:00 PM Eastern Time (US and Canada) Join Zoom Meeting https://us02web.zoom.us/j/2929499248?pwd=ZXhMVXlPSTFkWG8rc3kzWUFOU05adz09
Meeting ID: 292 949 9248 Passcode: 8xdXJ6 One tap mobile +19292056099,,2929499248#,,,,,,0#,,712624# US (New York) +13017158592,,2929499248#,,,,,,0#,,712624# US (Germantown)

Steve Stagon & John Ramos Invite You to 
Thursday Zoom Meeting  7 PM September 17, 2020

SEE LINK BELOW

SPECIAL GUEST PRESENTATION 

DR. CHRISTOPHER PAUL LACROSS, MD

TOPICS:

HIV & COVID-19

MEDICAL MARIJUANA 

MORE ABOUT DR. LACROSS

Dr. LaCross is with Midland Medical and accepting new patients, both for primary care, HIV management,

transgender medicine, and medical marijuana certification.

Dr. Christopher LaCross grew up in rural New Hampshire, after which he attended Tufts undergrad as a Spanish major and then Tufts Medical School following a year off doing HIV research and working as an EMT. He completed his residency 4 years ago at Tulane in New Orleans and then moved to Fort Lauderdale to continue his work as an internist with special interest in LGBT healthcare and HIV. He has worked as a hospitalist locally and this past year transitioned to outpatient practice at Midland Medical Center to work in LGBT/HIV primary care at as well a medical marijuana provider.


.

Steven Stagon and John Ramos

Invite you to a Zoom meeting:  

Topic: My Meeting Time: Sep 17, 2020 07:00 PM Eastern Time (US and Canada) Join Zoom Meeting https://us02web.zoom.us/j/2929499248?pwd=ZXhMVXlPSTFkWG8rc3kzWUFOU05adz09
Meeting ID: 292 949 9248 Passcode: 8xdXJ6 One tap mobile +19292056099,,2929499248#,,,,,,0#,,712624# US (New York) +13017158592,,2929499248#,,,,,,0#,,712624# US (Germantown)

Steve Stagon & John Ramos Invite You to 
Thursday Zoom Meeting  7 PM September 17, 2020

SEE LINK BELOW

SPECIAL GUEST PRESENTATION 

DR. CHRISTOPHER PAUL LACROSS, MD

TOPICS:

HIV & COVID-19

MEDICAL MARIJUANA 

MORE ABOUT DR. LACROSS

Dr. LaCross is with Midland Medical and accepting new patients, both for primary care, HIV management,

transgender medicine, and medical marijuana certification.

Dr. Christopher LaCross grew up in rural New Hampshire, after which he attended Tufts undergrad as a Spanish major and then Tufts Medical School following a year off doing HIV research and working as an EMT. He completed his residency 4 years ago at Tulane in New Orleans and then moved to Fort Lauderdale to continue his work as an internist with special interest in LGBT healthcare and HIV. He has worked as a hospitalist locally and this past year transitioned to outpatient practice at Midland Medical Center to work in LGBT/HIV primary care at as well a medical marijuana provider.



Steven Stagon and John Ramos invite you to a Zoom meeting :

Topic: My Meeting Time: Sep 17, 2020 07:00 PM Eastern Time (US and Canada) Join Zoom Meeting https://us02web.zoom.us/j/2929499248?pwd=ZXhMVXlPSTFkWG8rc3kzWUFOU05adz09
Meeting ID: 292 949 9248 Passcode: 8xdXJ6 One tap mobile +19292056099,,2929499248#,,,,,,0#,,712624# US (New York) +13017158592,,2929499248#,,,,,,0#,,712624# US (Germantown)

Steven Stagon is inviting you to a scheduled Zoom meeting.

Time: Sep 10, 2020 07:00 PM Eastern Time (US and Canada)

Topic: Reasons Why People Skip Their Meds

“Honestly, it just slipped my mind.”

How many times have you looked up and exclaimed, “Darn, I forgot to take my meds!” This happens more often than people admit. But remembering to take your meds is the key to compliance.

  • The key to remembering is tailoring your meds to your schedule. It’s like the saying, “Nobody is forgotten when it is convenient to remember him.” In order to remember to take your meds, you have to have a system that works with your routine, not against it.
  • “I can’t always afford my meds.”
  • Not all interruptions in treatment are based on things that you can control, especially when it comes to your cash flow. Whether you have lost your job and with it your health insurance; you never had health insurance; you don’t qualify for government assistance; you were booted to the AIDS Drug Assistance Program (ADAP) waiting list; or your insurance doesn’t cover the entire cost of your meds, being able to pay out of pocket can cost thousands a month. Those who don’t have that kind of cash may find themselves going without.
  • This issue may not be fixable, but talk to your provider about patient assistance programs to see what your next steps should be.
  • “My side effects are out of control.”
  • Side effects suck — it’s really that simple. Not everyone will experience them, but some will. And whether it’s vomiting, diarrhea, wild dreams, nerve damage, higher cholesterol levels, lipodystrophy or depression, side effects can seriously impact your motivation to adhere to your medications.
  • The key is to be knowledgeable and know what to expect before you start treatment. Also, ask your health care provider how to manage minor side effects if they arise. If you do experience some side effects and they are intolerable, don’t just quit your treatment altogether. Speak to your health care provider about other alternatives and the possibility of switching your regimen to something else.

“My housing isn’t always stable.”

In the 2010 documentary The Other City, one of the most heartbreaking moments was when J’Mia Edwards, an HIV-positive mother of three who was struggling to maintain her Section 8 housing, looked into the camera and said, “I need an apartment. My housing is my prevention.”

For people living with HIV who are homeless or who have unstable housing, basic needs (such as food, clothing, shelter and caring for children) often outrank taking their meds. And no one can fault them for that.

Also, having a stable roof over your head means you have a safe place to store your medication and refrigerate it if needed.

  • “I have too much going on.”
  • Life doesn’t stop because you have been diagnosed with a disease — nor do your responsibilities. Whether it’s a chaotic work schedule, taking care of loved ones or juggling a job and school, the act of getting your medications refilled regularly and taking your meds consistently is difficult to maintain when so much is expected of you.
  • But balance is important, especially when it comes to your health. If you can’t take care of yourself first, how are you going to be able to take care of your other responsibilities if you get really sick?
  • “I’m depressed.”
  • Mental health issues are not uncommon for people living with HIV. Stigma, isolation and rejection can lead to depression and if that depression goes untreated, it can deeply impact your ability to adhere to your medications. Even worse: Depression in the HIV community is massively underdiagnosed.
  • HIV care providers need to step up and screen better for mental health issues. But that doesn’t mean that you can’t open up and talk to your provider about how you are feeling emotionally, especially if those feelings are a factor in why you are not taking your medicine.

Join Zoom Meeting

https://us02web.zoom.us/j/2929499248?pwd=ZXhMVXlPSTFkWG8rc3kzWUFOU05adz09

Meeting ID: 292 949 9248

Passcode: 8xdXJ6

One tap mobile

+19292056099,,2929499248#,,,,,,0#,,712624# US (New York)

+13017158592,,2929499248#,,,,,,0#,,712624# US (Germantown)

Dial by your location

        +1 929 205 6099 US (New York)

        +1 301 715 8592 US (Germantown)

        +1 312 626 6799 US (Chicago)

        +1 669 900 6833 US (San Jose)

        +1 253 215 8782 US (Tacoma)

        +1 346 248 7799 US (Houston)

Meeting ID: 292 949 9248

Passcode: 712624

Find your local number: https://us02web.zoom.us/u/kdvIv6v3BG

 

Steven Stagon is inviting you to a scheduled Zoom meeting.

Time: Sep 10, 2020 07:00 PM Eastern Time (US and Canada)

Topic: Reasons Why People Skip Their Meds

“Honestly, it just slipped my mind.”

How many times have you looked up and exclaimed, “Darn, I forgot to take my meds!” This happens more often than people admit. But remembering to take your meds is the key to compliance.

  • The key to remembering is tailoring your meds to your schedule. It’s like the saying, “Nobody is forgotten when it is convenient to remember him.” In order to remember to take your meds, you have to have a system that works with your routine, not against it.
  • “I can’t always afford my meds.”
  • Not all interruptions in treatment are based on things that you can control, especially when it comes to your cash flow. Whether you have lost your job and with it your health insurance; you never had health insurance; you don’t qualify for government assistance; you were booted to the AIDS Drug Assistance Program (ADAP) waiting list; or your insurance doesn’t cover the entire cost of your meds, being able to pay out of pocket can cost thousands a month. Those who don’t have that kind of cash may find themselves going without.
  • This issue may not be fixable, but talk to your provider about patient assistance programs to see what your next steps should be.
  • “My side effects are out of control.”
  • Side effects suck — it’s really that simple. Not everyone will experience them, but some will. And whether it’s vomiting, diarrhea, wild dreams, nerve damage, higher cholesterol levels, lipodystrophy or depression, side effects can seriously impact your motivation to adhere to your medications.
  • The key is to be knowledgeable and know what to expect before you start treatment. Also, ask your health care provider how to manage minor side effects if they arise. If you do experience some side effects and they are intolerable, don’t just quit your treatment altogether. Speak to your health care provider about other alternatives and the possibility of switching your regimen to something else.

“My housing isn’t always stable.”

In the 2010 documentary The Other City, one of the most heartbreaking moments was when J’Mia Edwards, an HIV-positive mother of three who was struggling to maintain her Section 8 housing, looked into the camera and said, “I need an apartment. My housing is my prevention.”

For people living with HIV who are homeless or who have unstable housing, basic needs (such as food, clothing, shelter and caring for children) often outrank taking their meds. And no one can fault them for that.

Also, having a stable roof over your head means you have a safe place to store your medication and refrigerate it if needed.

  • “I have too much going on.”
  • Life doesn’t stop because you have been diagnosed with a disease — nor do your responsibilities. Whether it’s a chaotic work schedule, taking care of loved ones or juggling a job and school, the act of getting your medications refilled regularly and taking your meds consistently is difficult to maintain when so much is expected of you.
  • But balance is important, especially when it comes to your health. If you can’t take care of yourself first, how are you going to be able to take care of your other responsibilities if you get really sick?
  • “I’m depressed.”
  • Mental health issues are not uncommon for people living with HIV. Stigma, isolation and rejection can lead to depression and if that depression goes untreated, it can deeply impact your ability to adhere to your medications. Even worse: Depression in the HIV community is massively underdiagnosed.
  • HIV care providers need to step up and screen better for mental health issues. But that doesn’t mean that you can’t open up and talk to your provider about how you are feeling emotionally, especially if those feelings are a factor in why you are not taking your medicine.

Join Zoom Meeting

https://us02web.zoom.us/j/2929499248?pwd=ZXhMVXlPSTFkWG8rc3kzWUFOU05adz09

Meeting ID: 292 949 9248

Passcode: 8xdXJ6

One tap mobile

+19292056099,,2929499248#,,,,,,0#,,712624# US (New York)

+13017158592,,2929499248#,,,,,,0#,,712624# US (Germantown)

Dial by your location

        +1 929 205 6099 US (New York)

        +1 301 715 8592 US (Germantown)

        +1 312 626 6799 US (Chicago)

        +1 669 900 6833 US (San Jose)

        +1 253 215 8782 US (Tacoma)

        +1 346 248 7799 US (Houston)

Meeting ID: 292 949 9248

Passcode: 712624

Find your local number: https://us02web.zoom.us/u/kdvIv6v3BG

 

Steven Stagon is inviting you to a scheduled Zoom meeting.

THURSDAY TOPIC  SEPT. 3, 2020  7 PM

PRESENTED BY  

JOHN RAMOS & STEVE STAGON

.

951A5FC9-5E9A-4BCC-8601-6563AB948A73

ELECTIONS 2020

FACTS & FICTION

F266D27C-16F5-4184-9F4F-499B709B9CC3

. 

WHO CAN VOTE

WAYS TO VOTE

PLACES TO VOTE

VOTER REGISTRATION

VOTE BY MAIL

POSTAL MYTHS.

.fullsizeoutput_3ec1

9E861727-262C-4901-8168-A6CABC5A04D5

******************************.

****************

FINDING VOTER GUIDES 

OPEN DISCUSSION OF ISSUES

****

Time: Sep 3, 2020 07:00 PM Eastern Time (US and Canada)

Join Zoom Meeting
https://us02web.zoom.us/j/2929499248?pwd=ZXhMVXlPSTFkWG8rc3kzWUFOU05adz09

Meeting ID: 292 949 9248
Passcode: 8xdXJ6
One tap mobile
+19292056099,,2929499248#,,,,,,0#,,712624# US (New York)
+13017158592,,2929499248#,,,,,,0#,,712624# US (Germantown)

Dial by your location
+1 929 205 6099 US (New York)
+1 301 715 8592 US (Germantown)
+1 312 626 6799 US (Chicago)
+1 669 900 6833 US (San Jose)
+1 253 215 8782 US (Tacoma)
+1 346 248 7799 US (Houston)
Meeting ID: 292 949 9248
Passcode: 712624
Find your local number: https://us02web.zoom.us/u/kdvIv6v3BG

 

 

Steven Stagon is inviting you to a scheduled Zoom meeting.

THURSDAY TOPIC  SEPT. 3, 2020  7 PM

PRESENTED BY  

JOHN RAMOS & STEVE STAGON

.

951A5FC9-5E9A-4BCC-8601-6563AB948A73

ELECTIONS 2020

FACTS & FICTION

 

F266D27C-16F5-4184-9F4F-499B709B9CC3

. 

WHO CAN VOTE

WAYS TO VOTE

PLACES TO VOTE

VOTER REGISTRATION

VOTE BY MAIL

POSTAL MYTHS.

.fullsizeoutput_3ec1

9E861727-262C-4901-8168-A6CABC5A04D5

******************************.

****************

FINDING VOTER GUIDES 

OPEN DISCUSSION OF ISSUES

****

Time: Sep 3, 2020 07:00 PM Eastern Time (US and Canada)

Join Zoom Meeting
https://us02web.zoom.us/j/2929499248?pwd=ZXhMVXlPSTFkWG8rc3kzWUFOU05adz09

Meeting ID: 292 949 9248
Passcode: 8xdXJ6
One tap mobile
+19292056099,,2929499248#,,,,,,0#,,712624# US (New York)
+13017158592,,2929499248#,,,,,,0#,,712624# US (Germantown)

Dial by your location
+1 929 205 6099 US (New York)
+1 301 715 8592 US (Germantown)
+1 312 626 6799 US (Chicago)
+1 669 900 6833 US (San Jose)
+1 253 215 8782 US (Tacoma)
+1 346 248 7799 US (Houston)
Meeting ID: 292 949 9248
Passcode: 712624
Find your local number: https://us02web.zoom.us/u/kdvIv6v3BG

 

 

 

Steven Stagon is inviting you to a scheduled Zoom meeting.

Topic: Older gay gentlemen offer 15 life lessons to their younger gay counterparts
Time: Aug 27, 2020 07:00 PM Eastern Time (US and Canada)

Join Zoom Meeting
https://us02web.zoom.us/j/2929499248?pwd=ZXhMVXlPSTFkWG8rc3kzWUFOU05adz09

Meeting ID: 292 949 9248
Passcode: 8xdXJ6
One tap mobile
+19292056099,,2929499248#,,,,,,0#,,712624# US (New York)
+13017158592,,2929499248#,,,,,,0#,,712624# US (Germantown)

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+1 301 715 8592 US (Germantown)
+1 312 626 6799 US (Chicago)
+1 669 900 6833 US (San Jose)
+1 253 215 8782 US (Tacoma)
+1 346 248 7799 US (Houston)
Meeting ID: 292 949 9248
Passcode: 712624
Find your local number: https://us02web.zoom.us/u/kdvIv6v3BG

The topic for Thursday 08-27-20 is ‘Older gay gentlemen offer 15 lifelessonsto their younger gay counterparts

1. Don’t forget your friends •“When you are dating, don’t forget to maintain your close friendships. Friends often endure beyond romantic relationships. But they too require nurturing and maintenance.” (Dominic Davies, of UK-based Pink Therapy)

2. Own your sexuality •“Don’t be embarrassed to tell sex partners what you like doing in bed, or to ask for the sex you want. As gay men, we’re often taught to feel ashamed of our sexual desires, and that can leave many of us forever challenged when it comes to saying what we do and don’t enjoy.” (Anon.) •“Learn what turns you on and discuss that with your partner. Then explore more things to add to the list. Erotic pleasure is infinite, there is no need to be bored if you share your active imaginations!” (Dominic Davies)

3. Stay safe •“Have as much sex as you want with whoever you want and never feel guilty about it… but always be safe. There’s no sex so mind-blowing it’s worth risking your health for. And if someone tries to persuade you to be unsafe, that should be a reason to leave.” (SG)

4. Prioritize the right people •“Prioritize people who wish to prioritize you: not those who treat you as an option.” (DK)

5. Support others and they’ll support you •“Challenge prejudice and discrimination even when it isn’t aimed at you or people like you. Racism, misogyny, homophobia, transphobia and, yes, even ageism, are toxic, depriving people of opportunities to fulfill their potential. Our enemies seek to divide us. Don’t let them. Support others and you will be supported by others.” (Matthew Hodson, Executive Director, NAM / aidsmap)

6. Actions speak louder than words •“Someone may say that they’re committed to you or feel a certain way about you, but if their actions say otherwise, listen to what those actions are telling you. People really do reveal themselves through their actions.” (DK)

7. Strive to be kind •“Always try to treat others with kindness… even if you have the perfect, bitchy response to hand to put someone down.” (Anon.) •“Cruelty is not funny.” (Matthew Hodson)

8. Don’t ignore warning signs •“Don’t ignore red flags when getting involved with someone. They nearly always turn into bigger issues further down the line.” (Anon.)

9. Swap contact details •“If you have amazing sex with someone in a bathhouse or other sex venue, don’t be shy of asking them for their phone number. If you don’t, you’ll likely never see them again and may regret not asking for it. I never used to do this, but when I started doing so, I was surprised how often guys wanted to connect again or meet up. Not everyone is looking for an anonymous, brief encounter. In fact, most people aren’t.” (Anon.)

10. The right partner goes beyond the physical •“Good sex involves your heart, head and dick. If your dick is the only part of you really involved, don’t be surprised if, after you orgasm, you feel lonelier than ever…this is your heart and head saying, ‘Hey, why didn’t you let us in on this?’ Learn to open your heart and your mind as well as your legs!” (Michael Dale Kimmel, a California-licensed psychotherapist) •“Don’t fall in love with a man just because he has a gorgeous dick … or any other gorgeous body part. In a long-term relationship, sex will only ever be a small part of your adventures together: and personality and shared values will become more important.” (Anon.) •

11. Don’t fall for myths •“The old saying that ‘No-one loves a fairy over 40’ is a big, fat lie.” (Anon.)

12. Things will change and that’s OK •“What would I advise my 20-year-old self about love? Love is different when you’re in your twenties, it’s supposed to be an adventure; you’re meant to love lots of people in many ways. That’s what happens at your age. Love changes, as you get older: things get calmer, problems become more subtle, you’ll probably look for more stability and less drama. So, enjoy your lovers now, knowing it will just get better over time.” (Michael Dale Kimmel)

13. Cherish all generations •“Every generation is fabulous in its own way – and every generation will face its own struggles. My generation was decimated by AIDS. Chemsex continues to take a toll on our communities. We cannot be certain that the freedoms and rights we enjoy now will continue unless we remain vigilant. We deal with our challenges more effectively when we learn from the generations that came before us.” (Matthew Hodson)

14. Choose the relationship that’s right for you •“It’s possible to love more than one person at the same time, equally and differently. Some of us are naturally suited to non-monogamy and that can also be a ‘committed relationship.’ But be honest with yourself and your partner. Cheating sucks.” (Dominic Davies) •“Make sure you get the relationship you want. The great thing about being gay is that we don’t feel like we have to have a relationship like our parents. If you want to be open, negotiate that. And if you want to be monogamous, then that’s OK too.” (SG) •

15. Life is too short to not be yourself •“Life is too short to spend time hiding your true self or trying to live up to the expectations of others. This is your life and you only get to live it once.” (DK)

Steven Stagon is inviting you to a scheduled Zoom meeting.

Topic: Older gay gentlemen offer 15 life lessons to their younger gay counterparts
Time: Aug 27, 2020 07:00 PM Eastern Time (US and Canada)

Join Zoom Meeting
https://us02web.zoom.us/j/2929499248?pwd=ZXhMVXlPSTFkWG8rc3kzWUFOU05adz09

Meeting ID: 292 949 9248
Passcode: 8xdXJ6
One tap mobile
+19292056099,,2929499248#,,,,,,0#,,712624# US (New York)
+13017158592,,2929499248#,,,,,,0#,,712624# US (Germantown)

Dial by your location
+1 929 205 6099 US (New York)
+1 301 715 8592 US (Germantown)
+1 312 626 6799 US (Chicago)
+1 669 900 6833 US (San Jose)
+1 253 215 8782 US (Tacoma)
+1 346 248 7799 US (Houston)
Meeting ID: 292 949 9248
Passcode: 712624
Find your local number: https://us02web.zoom.us/u/kdvIv6v3BG

The topic for Thursday 08-27-20 is ‘Older gay gentlemen offer 15 lifelessonsto their younger gay counterparts

1. Don’t forget your friends •“When you are dating, don’t forget to maintain your close friendships. Friends often endure beyond romantic relationships. But they too require nurturing and maintenance.” (Dominic Davies, of UK-based Pink Therapy)

2. Own your sexuality •“Don’t be embarrassed to tell sex partners what you like doing in bed, or to ask for the sex you want. As gay men, we’re often taught to feel ashamed of our sexual desires, and that can leave many of us forever challenged when it comes to saying what we do and don’t enjoy.” (Anon.) •“Learn what turns you on and discuss that with your partner. Then explore more things to add to the list. Erotic pleasure is infinite, there is no need to be bored if you share your active imaginations!” (Dominic Davies)

3. Stay safe •“Have as much sex as you want with whoever you want and never feel guilty about it… but always be safe. There’s no sex so mind-blowing it’s worth risking your health for. And if someone tries to persuade you to be unsafe, that should be a reason to leave.” (SG)

4. Prioritize the right people •“Prioritize people who wish to prioritize you: not those who treat you as an option.” (DK)

5. Support others and they’ll support you •“Challenge prejudice and discrimination even when it isn’t aimed at you or people like you. Racism, misogyny, homophobia, transphobia and, yes, even ageism, are toxic, depriving people of opportunities to fulfill their potential. Our enemies seek to divide us. Don’t let them. Support others and you will be supported by others.” (Matthew Hodson, Executive Director, NAM / aidsmap)

6. Actions speak louder than words •“Someone may say that they’re committed to you or feel a certain way about you, but if their actions say otherwise, listen to what those actions are telling you. People really do reveal themselves through their actions.” (DK)

7. Strive to be kind •“Always try to treat others with kindness… even if you have the perfect, bitchy response to hand to put someone down.” (Anon.) •“Cruelty is not funny.” (Matthew Hodson)

8. Don’t ignore warning signs •“Don’t ignore red flags when getting involved with someone. They nearly always turn into bigger issues further down the line.” (Anon.)

9. Swap contact details •“If you have amazing sex with someone in a bathhouse or other sex venue, don’t be shy of asking them for their phone number. If you don’t, you’ll likely never see them again and may regret not asking for it. I never used to do this, but when I started doing so, I was surprised how often guys wanted to connect again or meet up. Not everyone is looking for an anonymous, brief encounter. In fact, most people aren’t.” (Anon.)

10. The right partner goes beyond the physical •“Good sex involves your heart, head and dick. If your dick is the only part of you really involved, don’t be surprised if, after you orgasm, you feel lonelier than ever…this is your heart and head saying, ‘Hey, why didn’t you let us in on this?’ Learn to open your heart and your mind as well as your legs!” (Michael Dale Kimmel, a California-licensed psychotherapist) •“Don’t fall in love with a man just because he has a gorgeous dick … or any other gorgeous body part. In a long-term relationship, sex will only ever be a small part of your adventures together: and personality and shared values will become more important.” (Anon.) •

11. Don’t fall for myths •“The old saying that ‘No-one loves a fairy over 40’ is a big, fat lie.” (Anon.)

12. Things will change and that’s OK •“What would I advise my 20-year-old self about love? Love is different when you’re in your twenties, it’s supposed to be an adventure; you’re meant to love lots of people in many ways. That’s what happens at your age. Love changes, as you get older: things get calmer, problems become more subtle, you’ll probably look for more stability and less drama. So, enjoy your lovers now, knowing it will just get better over time.” (Michael Dale Kimmel)

13. Cherish all generations •“Every generation is fabulous in its own way – and every generation will face its own struggles. My generation was decimated by AIDS. Chemsex continues to take a toll on our communities. We cannot be certain that the freedoms and rights we enjoy now will continue unless we remain vigilant. We deal with our challenges more effectively when we learn from the generations that came before us.” (Matthew Hodson)

14. Choose the relationship that’s right for you •“It’s possible to love more than one person at the same time, equally and differently. Some of us are naturally suited to non-monogamy and that can also be a ‘committed relationship.’ But be honest with yourself and your partner. Cheating sucks.” (Dominic Davies) •“Make sure you get the relationship you want. The great thing about being gay is that we don’t feel like we have to have a relationship like our parents. If you want to be open, negotiate that. And if you want to be monogamous, then that’s OK too.” (SG) •

15. Life is too short to not be yourself •“Life is too short to spend time hiding your true self or trying to live up to the expectations of others. This is your life and you only get to live it once.” (DK)